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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26925148">The Great GatsBee</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/StupidStory/pseuds/StupidStory'>StupidStory</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Bee Movie (2007), Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, M/M, ya like jazz?</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:00:49</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,675</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26925148</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/StupidStory/pseuds/StupidStory</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jay Gatsby hosts a Valentine's Day party where he plans to get together with Daisy even tho she's already taken by a handsome bee, and she takes satisfying revenge against Tom Buchanan. Also, Nick is tired of being merely a bystander. Saccharine love poems that would make A Troll in Central Park look like an R rated horror film are also involved.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Daisy/Barry Benson, Nick Carraway/Jay Gatsby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Great GatsBee</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jay Gatsby looked into the window of Daisy's apartment, secretly stalking her because Facebook ain't been invented yet. It seemed like she could only speak in arguing. Why does she even hang around that Tom guy anyway? He is as toxic as Behind the Meme haters. He was thankful that Myrtle died because her boob made a sturdy cover for his book of love poems and pick-up lines dedicated to Daisy. He decided he would leave out that grisly detail when he planned to give it to her this upcoming Valentine's Day. <br/>	“Oh hey Jay,” Nick said.<br/>	“Hey old sport,” Mr. Gatsby said back. “So what's up?”<br/>	“Just bein' pointless background scenery,” Nick replied, even tho he was a statue. “I dunno why the story was told in my point of view when I'm not even the main character, so I petitioned the author to change it to 3rd person view and it seemed to work.” They both looked in the sea beyond West egg. Instead of a green light like there had been, there was now a red light in its place. I have no idea what this means, just felt like mentioning it.<br/>	“Oh, that. Apparently they tried to put traffic lights in the sea to try to prevent shipwrecks. It was stuck on green and as a result multiple ships collided on the infinity-way intersection, old sport.” Gatsby was telling him. “I think that Tom guy might actually be a descendant of president James Buchanan, which might explain his temperament, cuz ya know, James Buchanan was the worst president ever, old sport.”<br/>	Deciding that he had enough of being a peeping not Tom, Gatsby got back to his car, but it wouldn't start. “Money damn it!” He swore. He decided to look under the hood of his car. For some reason there was a beehive underneath. “Well shit!” Gatsby kicked his car in the groin. The car screamed in pain and swore a bunch of times. Gatsby was back on the road. He had another party to plan, since tomorrow was Valentine's Day, and Daisy was on the guest list. Oh, he had one heck of a plan to win her back.<br/>	At Gatsby's Valentine's Day party, some highly autotuned techno music was playing on the record player, with lyrics fitting for the occasion. Kesha's evil twin was singing “I do what I want, middle finger in the air. Gonna party party party like a millionaire! Imma dance like a slut, and I don't even care. Gonna party party party like a millionaire!”  There was also a giant movie screen showing a rubber hose animated cartoon featuring guys with cups as heads, and also featuring literally every racist stereotype ever, since it was deemed perfectly acceptable. Not only did it feature every racist stereotype ever but it also sacrificed well-written story in favor of it.<br/>Daisy was at the party since she was invited, and she was wearing a cute hat.<br/>	“Oh, hai old sport!” Gatsby greeted. “Like your hat old sport. It's cute, old sport.”<br/>	“Awww thanxxx. Is that Kesha playing on the record player?” Daisy asked.<br/>	“It's a band called the Millionaires, and yes, that is Kesha,” Gatsby replied. Then the song changed to another Kesha song. Daisy cringed at the lyrics, which went like “Shut up cunt I'll cut your tongue. Back down bitch you're fucking done. Talk shit to us you fucking haters. You're the ones who fucking made us.” Gatsby sure had an odd taste in music and especially lyrical content.<br/>	“Can we put on some smooth jazz? My boyfriend asked me if I liked jazz and I said that yes, I do like jazz, and apparently he likes jazz too.”<br/>	“Boyfriend?” Gatsby said disappointingly. “If you wanna listen to jazz, just watch the Cuphead cartoon I have playing on the movie screen.” Daisy went over to where the movie screen was and watched the Cuphead cartoon just to listen to jazz, and then took off her hat so she could slow-dance with Barry. Just when they leaned in for a kiss, one of the couples dancing near her screamed.<br/>	“AAAAAAHHHH, BEE!” They let go of their significant other, grabbed a newspaper, and swatted at Barry.<br/>	“Cease and desist. That bee is my boyfriend.”<br/>	“I thought Tom was your husband.”<br/>	“Not anymore. I broke it off after he was BEEing mean to me one too many times, not to mention being a cheater, plus this bee asked me if I liked jazz, which I do very much. I've been happier in the 15 minutes I've been together with Barry Bee Benson than in the entire 400 years I've been with Tom Buchanan.” While she was gushing about Barry, Gatsby spent the next hour or so trying to work up the courage to ask her to close her eyes and hold out her hands.<br/>	“Close your eyes and hold out your hands, old sport” Gatsby finally said after an hour or so of reluctance. Tom was there too, his expression was similar to that guy in the background on that one “Kissing Booth” promo image on Netflix. Daisy did both of those things as he plopped a skinny feeling item in her hands. “Okay, you can open your eyes now.” Daisy opened her eyes and screamed in bloody horror. In her hands was a booklet with what looked like a left boob for the cover.<br/>	“DUDE! WHAT THE FUCK?”<br/>	“Come on, just open it, will ya?” Gatsby pleaded desperately.<br/>`	“This is just wrong on so many levels. Hold on a moment!” Daisy retched and vomit came out her talk hole. “This is disgusting and repulsive and idiotic.” Daisy reluctantly opened the book. Inside was a saccharine love poem that was so saccharine it might as well have been a diabetes virus that is more easily spread than COVID-19. Reading the first couple sentences made her vomit blood. She then curled her fingers in frustration, threw the book in a garbage pail, poured gasoline in the garbage pail, lit a match, and threw it in the garbage pail, watching the boob book crumple and blacken since that's more entertaining than the Lion King remake. She then put out the fire with her own vomit.<br/>	“And you have the nerve to hide a sappy love poem that's so saccharine it made me vomit blood. That is NOT how you win me over. Git gud.”<br/>	“I'm sorry Daisy. Let me make it up to you. I promise I won't be mean to you like Tom.”<br/>	“NO! I will never be attracted to you. I only love your parties. I already found someone new. Someone who's a real honey. Someone who likes jazz.” Daisy removed her hat and pointed to the top of her head. “This is my boyfriend, Barry Bee Benson. I am celebrating Valentine's Day with him. He's so cute and sweet, and he likes how my name is also the name of a flower.”<br/>	“Hi guys,” Nick said to Daisy and Gatsby.<br/>	“Nick!” Gatsby called back. “So... Do you wanna go out sometime, old sport?”<br/>	“Sure!” Nick agreed. “To be honest, I'm sick of being a mere human prop.”<br/>	“And I'm sick of being friendzoned,” a sound that sounded exactly like that came out of Gatsby's talk hole. The two of them tenderly kissed each other. Daisy was relieved that she didn't have to deal with someone other than Barry Bee Benson trying to win her. For a fleeting moment, at least.<br/>	“Hi Daisy. I love you. Please come back to me,” Tom demanded. “You are so attractive that every millisecond I am not looking at you I want to die. Even when I blink while looking at you that counts as a moment when I'm not looking at you, so every time I blink, even if I'm looking right at you while I blink, I want to die, so I severed my eyelids so I can look at you without blinking. If that isn't the perfect compliment to win a girl's heart then I don't know what is.”<br/>	“No,” Daisy said firmly. “Go away.”<br/>	“You suck. If I can't have you, there WILL be unforeseen consequences. Just you wait.”<br/>	“Can I move in with you?” She inquired of Barry.<br/>	“Sure,” Benson satisfied her query with a sound from his talk hole. <br/>	“You live under the hood of Gatsby's car?”<br/>	“Yes.”<br/>	“And you somehow expect me to move in with you HOW?”<br/>	“I can have me and all my workmates expand the hive enough for a human to move in with us,” Barry stated.<br/>	“That sounds really swell!” Daisy pumped her fists in the air excitedly.<br/>	Barry Bee Benson flew under the hood of Mr. Gatsby's car and ordered all his bee friends to get to work on expanding the hive, chop chop. Day and night they worked tirelessly, their eyelids feeling heavier than yo mama.<br/>	“It is finished,” Barry Bee Benson declared. A huge section of the hive stuck out of the car's hood, big enough for Daisy to be able to step inside and have some personal space. Daisy hoped Gatsby didn't have to drive anywhere anytime soon since this addition to the hive blocked the driver view.<br/>	“Aww, you even made a bed for me!” Any other human would be terrified of such a house but not Daisy. Even if this was a hive of murder hornets, it would still be less scary than living with Tom.<br/>	“Damn it, I forgot to buy some soft drinks, old sport! Stupid teetotalers making me buy non-alcoholic drinks cuz they're too much of a wuss to drink alcohol, old sport. Mental note: never put teetotalers on your guest list, old sport.” Gatsby muttered under his breath as he approached his car. “Oh. My. Money! What the hell is that on my hood, old sport? I can't even see, old sport ! Oh well, old sport. Guess I'll chance it, old sport. Those teetotalers are counting on me, old sport.”<br/>	“Do you really say old sport in almost every sentence?” Daisy's lips and tongue moved in such a way to expel air molecules that register in the ear of the listener so they would sound exactly like “Do you really say old sport in almost every sentence?”<br/>	Gatsby moved his lips in such a way that when listening to him, one would hear the word “yes.”<br/>	Gatsby drove his car anyway despite him having a literal house on the hood of his car and drove like a blind drunk. In other words, better than how the average driver around where I live drives. He felt a sudden bump and heard a loud scream.<br/>	“Damn it. Why does my car make a screaming noise every time I run over someone? Is it even meant to do that? Wonder if I should take it to a mechanic.” <br/>	Daisy got out to inspect the carnage. The victim's boob was hanging open like an open book, just like Myrtle's. I'll give you a quick multiple choice question. What do you think was Daisy's first reaction  when looking at this grisly sight? Was it:<br/>A) Dry heaving<br/>B) “Thoughts and prayers.”<br/>C) Remembering her own reaction when Gatsby tried to give her a boob book as a Valentine's Day gift and hope that Tom would react the same way if she made her own to give to him.											<br/>If you guessed C, you're correct! If you guessed either A or B, you are an idiot who probably has to look up a tutorial on how to breathe. A sadistic smile formed on her face. “Oh my gosh, I would love to do something like this to Tom. If he wants me back so bad then I should make him no longer attracted to me.” She started writing the most saccharine love poems she could muster while eating hundreds of lettuce heads and broccoli and running marathons so she doesn't get diabetes from the sheer amount of saccharine that her love poem oozed. It tasted enough like diabetes to make The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure look like the Human Centipede series. I cannot quote any of it verbatim because if I did then I would start a diabetes pandemic.<br/>	“Hey Gatsby, can you drop me off at Tom's place? I have something to give to him.”<br/>	“You're not gonna try to win him back, are you, old sport? I thought you were in love with a bee.”<br/>	“He's dead to me, but I can temporarily bring him back to life to me.”<br/>	When they got to Tom's place, Daisy got out and knocked on Tom's door.<br/>	“I knew you'd come crawling back, bitch! Get in here so you can be my sexy puppet who only exists so I can have someone to be married to. Also, please break up with that bee of yours. I want you back. I'd rather suffer 2nd degree burns for all eternity than go one more second without you.” While Tom was audibly mouthing those words, a buzzing sound came from the hat he was wearing.<br/>	“I got something for you. Close your eyes and hold out your hands.” Tom did as instructed, thinking Daisy might have come around. All those hopes were instantly dashed.<br/>	“IS THIS BOOK COVER MADE OF SOMEONE'S BOOB?” Tom demanded. He reluctantly read the love poems, vomiting blood because it was that vapid. “Oh my god, WHY? You cut off someone's boob just to use as a book cover! If this is your idea of being romantic, you can go fuck off! I no longer wanna be yandere to you!”<br/>	“YES!” Daisy whispered excitedly, pumping her fists in the air excitedly. Time to put one final nail in the coffin.<br/>	“Barry, go sting him!”<br/>	“Yes ma'am!” Barry landed on Tom's crotch and stung him right there.<br/>	“OOOOOWWWWW! And your stupid boyfriend just stung me in the balls! What the hell did I ever do to you? Just go! I found someone new anyway.” Tom then took off his hat and a murder hornet flew out, and it landed on his lips and kissed him. “I love you too, Horny H. Henson.” Barry screamed like how someone screams when someone describes them as screaming like a girl.<br/>	“Get me outta here!” Barry screamed. “Murder hornets are our mortal enemies!”<br/>	Daisy and Barry got back in the mobile hive, and Gatsby took off, realizing he still had to buy some fruit juice for the teetotalers at his party.<br/>	“So why did you even build your hive on the hood of his car?” Daisy asked.<br/>	“Word on the street is that someone named Gaston is on his way here and he wants to eat the entirety of West Egg because he's gotta have his 5 dozen eggs so he can be roughly the size of a barge. I wanted my hive to be a mobile home just in case those rumors were true. It's not enough that humans steal our honey, now they gotta eat places that have 'egg' in their name just so they can have more of those precious grams of protein.”<br/>	“Oh my, I don't want West Egg to get eaten. I gotta warn everyone!” Daisy and Barry stayed in the hive while Gatsby walked into Walgreen's and bought some bottles of Body Armor and Gatorade.<br/>	Once Gatsby made it back to his mansion, Daisy made a beeline for where all the people were, which was everywhere inside and on the lawn, and hollered at the top of her lungs. “WE HAVE TO EVACUATE WEST EGG! SOMEONE IS ON HIS WAY HERE TO EAT IT!”<br/>	“Bruh,” some random person responded.<br/>	“Dude, that joke is cornier than my poop after swallowing an entire corn on the cob without chewing it.”<br/>	“Daisy, calm down, I said it was just a rumor,” Barry assured her.<br/>	“Well I'd rather be prepared only to have it not happen than to go business as normal only to have this Gaston guy eat our entire hometown while we're in it.”<br/>	“I got drinks for all the teetotalers!” Gatsby announced, holding up a circular tray with one hand. Within seconds the tray was completely empty of Body Armor and Gatorade. <br/>	“Hold up. What's that guy over there doing?” Someone pointed at some big muscular guy wearing a red coat and with a blunderbuss slung around his shoulder on the shore, gnawing at the ground on the outskirts of West Egg.<br/>	“Oh my Money, Daisy was right! That guy is eating West Egg!” Gatsby ejaculated.<br/>	“West Egg is no more!” Jordan squealed.<br/>	“We're all gonna die!” The collective crowd squealed like someone from a hilariously bad B-movie. They all ran around randomly while screaming. Gatsby sped off, ready to get the hell out of West Egg before it was completely eaten. Then they heard an evil laughter, followed by a scary form that they only saw once before.<br/>	“Horny H. Henson!” Barry gasped. <br/>	“Listen up maggot. You're gonna die tonight and so is your wimpy ass hive. Have you forgotten that I'm a murder hornet? Your little date with Daisy will be cut short, and then Gatsby's mansion will be MINE! Me and my hornet posse will move in, have hornet parties all of our own, and then me and Tom will move in and live happily ever after.”<br/>	“Joke's on you, cuz everyone's leaving West Egg since some dude named Gaston is eating it so there will be no more West Egg, and therefore no more Gatsby's mansion.”<br/>	“Oh, but Gatsby's mansion isn't going anywhere,” Horny continued. “That was all just a trick to make everyone leave so my hivemates who are all Tom's other spouses could all move in. Now that I told you all this, I must kill you and hurry back to West Egg so I can establish my new hive with Tom and the bois. Actually I was gonna kill you anyway cuz, ya know, I'm a murder hornet and you're a bee.” Horny grabbed Barry in a chokehold. She was so much bigger and stronger than Barry. <br/>	“BARRY!” Daisy tried to intervene, but Horny flexed her stinger.<br/>	“If you even think about intervening, I will sting you several times, and according to that one video from Coyote Peterson, it's worse than the Bullet Ant.”<br/>	“I'm willing to take that risk. Barry is my everything.”<br/>	“Okay then.” Horny ate from a miniature bag of popcorn. “This is gonna be fun.” She opened up her mandibles and positioned them just under Barry's head such that closing them like scissors would snap his head off. Daisy had to think fast. She grabbed the morning newspaper and slammed it on Horny just in the nick of time.<br/>	“I gotta hurry back to Gatsby's mansion! Since I am a woman in this time period, that means I am a bad driver, but that doesn't matter considering what's at stake here.” She floored it. She probably went a good 90mph or so. She probably spent more time off the road than on it.<br/>	When she got back to Gatsby's mansion, she stopped the car so suddenly her eyes bungee jumped out of her head, stretching the optic nerve to its very limit, and then went back in seamlessly. Gatsby's mansion was already starting to look like half-mansion, half hornet nest.<br/>	“No stopping us now, stupid underlings! MWAHAHAHA!” Horny laughed evilly. She was holding a whip. Was she relying on slave labor to build her new hive?<br/>	“They're completely ruining my Valentine's Day party, old sport. And my mansion, old sport!” Gatsby curled his fingers in frustration.<br/>What was Gatsby, Barry, and Daisy's plan? Was it:<br/>A) Politely asking them to stop it and go away<br/>B) Running around randomly while screaming hysterically, while doing nothing else, or<br/>C) Start eating West Egg themselves<br/>If you guessed C, you're correct. If you guessed either A or B then you would fail at FNAF 3 night 1. Actually they did a little bit of B first before realizing that wouldn't work.<br/>“Come on guys, let's do this!” Daisy beckoned Barry and Gatsby. They started at the edge of West Egg and sank their teeth into it, and took a bite. Then they took another bite. It didn't take long before getting warm food belly but they still kept on. Eventually everything almost up to the mansion was eaten.<br/>	“What are you guys doing?” Horny demanded. “You are not going to ruin our hive party.”<br/>	“Yeah cut it out!” Tom demanded. “I would like it if me and my thousands of significant others could just party in peace without having to worry about whether or not our hometown is being eaten.”<br/>	“Yeah well you shoulda thought of that before stealing Gatsby's mansion to use as your hive.,” Barry shouted. They ate even more of West Egg.<br/>	“AAAAHHH! Okay okay, we'll leave!”<br/>	While no one was looking, Daisy stole Gatsby's car, ran over a random girl in such a way that her boob was torn off, and wrote yet another boob book of poems, signed Tom's name on it, and left it in front of Horny.<br/>	“Tom left a little surprise for ya,” Daisy said to Horny. Horny read the book of love poems and vomited blood.<br/>	“Oh, he will pay!” Horny stung Tom and then all of Tom's other significant others stung him too. He screamed the Goofy holler as he was being stung. He later died of his injuries.<br/>	Some months after that, Gatsby and Nick got married and moved in together, and adopted a bullet ant. Barry moved his hive into the Morton building in Gatsby's backyard.<br/>	“Aw, DANG IT!” Nick cursed. “I went through this entire story not wanting to feel like a human prop that only just observed everything without doing much of anything at all, I get into a relationship with Mr. Gatsby, and I STILL am treated like a prop. Well fuck you StupidStory! I never wanna be in any of your stories ever again!” And then he flipped the bird.</p>
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